We all have our own issues, right? I am an introvert by nature but I can sometimes be an extrovert when I am around other introverts or when I need to for a job or to reach a certain goal. A friend of mine once told me that makes me an ambivert. According to dictionary.com (my answer to many questions), that means: one whose personality type is intermediate between introvert and extrovert. I think I would agree to that. I wasn't always this way. I was an extreme introvert from birth to college. I stayed at home a lot. I had extroverted friends who spoke a lot so that I didn't have to. When I was in a group, I was the token listener. Then I met the one person that changed everything....
The one that has really brought me towards moments of extroversion, and even days of extroversion is my husband. Meet Sam Kraut: joking professional, musical extraordinaire, lover of all people; all groups, all gatherings of 20+ people, especially when he gets to be in the middle of it! At the beginning of our relationship I was both impressed and intrigued by this. Then he started inviting me to join him wherever he went. My heart wanted to follow him wherever he went, but my mind would panic at the last minute. "Wait a minute! Where are we going? How many people are there? You can do all the talking right? Do I have to talk to them? Aaaggghhhhh!"
Over the years I have learned how to be around more people, put on my smile, help, serve, and love others, and then go home for some much needed down time. I have also made an impact on Sam. He has learned that he can't go to every party he's invited to, can't have dinner with friends and then stay out laughing and joking the night away any time he wants. He has gotten to the point where he enjoys his down time at home as well.
Our relationship has taken great compromise, great faith, and a never ending supply of forgiveness! But we keep going. We keep praying, we keep working on ourselves and helping each other. We have to make sure that we don't get that part mixed up! Don't help yourself and work on your spouse - that gets you in a world of trouble. I know this from first hand experience! I have tried and tried to make Sam more like me. He has tried and tried to make me more like Him. It doesn't work that way! God makes the changes for someone with an open heart who wants to work and improve himself or herself! God made us opposites on purpose! Sam is here to make sure that I get out of the house and socialize and get connected with people and don't let my own thoughts drive me crazy. I am here to make sure that Sam takes time to stay home and have some down time when necessary, or stay home and get some work done when necessary. It's a give and take. If your spouse is meant to change, the change will not come from you. That is God's job. I have trust issues, but I must trust my husband and I must trust God to guide my husband when he needs it!
Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."